I’ve been texting back and forth with a woman from my college campus for some time. We went out once. We had fun and enjoyed each other's company.
When I got home in the evening after the date she even texted me saying she had a great time. I said I also enjoyed her company, wished her goodnight and went to sleep. In the next few days after the date we were both quite occupied with school.
After a few days I texted her asking how she is. She only answered with: “Fine.” I didn’t want to act needy so I just answered with a short: “I’m glad to hear that.” She didn’t reply after that. Over the next few days I saw her walking around and hanging out with another guy.
Maybe it was just her classmate. I didn’t want to make a big deal out of it and tried to keep it out of my head.
One evening I wrote to her asking her how her day was but she didn’t answer. Last Friday she texted me asking me about how I am doing with my school project I’ve been working on for the past few weeks. I asked her why she’s been so distant lately. She said she had a lot going on since we last saw each other and to that I answered she could have at least answered my text.
She then apologized and I haven heard from her since then. I haven’t texted her either. I kinda liked her and I’m really upset that I messed up. What should I do?
We’re glad to hear that you managed to secure a date with your woman and that you apparently executed the date but let's now talk where you messed up.
Now first of all the most basic rule we teach in our course is that the telephone is for setting dates.
Especially in the early stages of your relationship with a woman you don’t text back and forth for no particular reason.
You don’t check up on her before you go to bed, you don’t send good morning texts and random selfies. It only signals that you have a surplus of time and therefore your time is not a scarce asset. People tend to value things that are scarce more.
She will subconsciously presume that you have very little things going on in your life. In your private and career life. Both have negative connotations. If you have too much time in your career life it signals that you are not very ambitious and probably lack resources.
In terms of private life it signals that no one actually values your company which is an indicator that you are not interesting and in general don’t provide much value to people around you.
So you text to set dates. I know it’s tempting to get that reassurance that she likes but you’re not doing yourself any favor. You have to be disciplined.
So asking her how she is serves no purpose if you had no intention of inviting her out. Regarding her answer. You shouldn’t make too much of it.
First of all you asked a pretty unnecessary question and she might have been in a hurry or she was occupied with something. Maybe she was in a bad mood and she didn’t want to tell you what put her in such a mood. Neither she didn’t feel like lying about how great her day had been. To avoid such unnecessary interactions you should only contact a woman with the intention of setting a date.
It’s a golden rule and you should stick to it no matter what. Once again the second time. No need for checking up on her. About the guy you saw her with.
You only went out once, what do you expect of her? To stop talking to other guys?
You shouldn’t put any limits on her during the dating phase in terms of relationships.
Your job is to hang out with her in person and have fun. Remember she is the one who should try to determine the status of your relationship.
When she didn’t answer your text, maybe she was occupied, maybe her interest lowered. You don’t know what was the reason and you don’t ask about it.
You should date other women during that time anyway.
You don’t do yourself any favor by double texting after her not answering and especially not with a text you sent. It shows that your feelings are hurt and you can’t stop thinking about her.
Remember you should act indifferent as if nothing bothers you. You could invite her out, but if she wouldn’t reply to that you shouldn’t text her another time. You have way better chances of going out with her another time by leaving it as it is.
You should proceed to date other women and maybe she replies and you then set a date.
During the dating phase you only text to set up the next date, if the woman doesn’t answer you you don’t double text, you never act offended, you don’t put limits on a woman in terms of relationships with other people, women who care about relationship labels.
You should date multiple women at the same time to both get yourself distracted because it is very hard to be disciplined and not obsess over a single woman especially if you like her and it should be in your interest to meet a lot of different women to get a sense of what you look for in a woman.
If you want to lear more on how to build attraction visit our website
stellargent.com.
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